Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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