How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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