What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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