My friend was driving me home from a party, and was quite drunk. I was relieved that we did not get into a car crash.

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Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What's up with airplane food? Not sure, but last flight I was on they didn't serve any food. It could have been because it was too short of a flight or perhaps the recessed economy caused jetliners to cut costs. Either way, I didn't get a bag of peanuts.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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tim has no humor

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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Roses are red, VIolets are blue, Tulips are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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This is an anti-joke.

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Why did the man drive into the river? He was sleep deprived from working overtime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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