What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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your momma is so fat she has diabetes

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops