What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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joke under this line wins _________________________

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

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Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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What do you call Rosa Parks? One bitchy negro. Just kidding she was a visionary for human rights, now you can't dislike this cause you'll be saying that Rosa Parks wasn't a visionary, take that blacks.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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