A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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