Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

A seal walks into a club.

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

Tucker Rivera

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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