What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

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What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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