How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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I'm a psychic. Don't believe me? Think of any number between 1 and 20. Got it? Your number is 17. Please comment if I got it right

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John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? Boy scouts come back from camp.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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Q. Why did little suzy fall off her swing? A. She dosen`t have any arms. Knock knock. Whos there? Not Suzy.

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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