what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Hello.

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Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

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People who find just saying 69 is the funniest thing ever.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

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A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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