Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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