Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

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How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Jesus. Jesus who? You're going to hell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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