person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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There once was a little girl called maddie who had a very earisponaceable daddy, she was taken from her bed and now she is dead and was raped by a Portuguese tranny

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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