Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

The first cow: are you worried about mad cow disease? the second cow: no, im a helicopter

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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