How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

Your gay

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

What is worse than losing your phone charger... Being viciously raped by a group of angry vegans feminist mad at you for eating a burger, while walking out of Hooters.

Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

Barack Obama.

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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