How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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