What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

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How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

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What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

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Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

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Your mom is so fat that she actually had a pretty hard time finding a husband.

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One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn't tell any funny jokes? He went to Anti Joke and posted 1000's.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

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Why did the chicken cross the road. He didn't, this joke gets old really fast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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