Q; What feels like plastic and tastes fake? A: School Food

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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Q: Why did the little boy drop his toy? A: He fell and broke his wrist, then dropped it in the emergency room, due to the broken wrist.

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what is worse than joel an infested asshole

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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