What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

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rawrrrrrrrrrrr

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

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Male leadership.

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why did the boy fall back wards? he was shot dead

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what is pink and shaped like a banana? A pink banana.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you look closely, it's not a chicken, it's a man wearing a costume. He's going to a halloween party with some friends. Sally was not invited.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

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What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops