Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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69.

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops