If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

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A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

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There is a man laying on the floor in a pool of blood and vomit, there is a broken beer bottle in a puddle of beer next to him. He thinks is a sponge.Purple

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

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A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

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If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops