How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

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Lol, okay you have made Nero of the clan of the Moralians the mighty laugh and go aww... Seriously, first of all, WHAT THE FUCK IS NAUSEUS? Secondly, okay its Ridge Racer, close enough, aww, seriously that sounds like the cutest thing, I mean did you bleed? DID YOU HARM YOURSELF! DELIGHTFUL... Moral: Seriously though, seeing you tilt over while playing a racing game, kinda cute, just put a pillow there next time you know just saying, because I play videogames, I cant go sexytime for hours without pumping some ADRENALINE INTO MY MIGHTY ROD OF STONEFLESH!

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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