Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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Yo momma soo fat, she got diabetes and died

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

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* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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seek beauty

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops