- Anti Joke

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

What is grey and cannot fly? A parking lot.

What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

what's white, sits around all day, and sucks on tits? a baby.

Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

What did the Chinese guy say to the black guy? Nothing, the black guy dosen't speak chinese.

how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

What's brown and slimy? brown slime

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

There once was a mountain climber. He loved to climb mountains. He had climbed all of the world's tallest peaks...except Mount Everest. So, one day he decides to climb Mount Everest. He takes weeks and weeks to prepare himself. He trains and trains three times a day till he thinks he is ready to climb Mount Everest. Climbing up it takes forever. It feels like it has been days in the dreary cold. Finally, he reaches the peak. It is a glorious occasion. On the way down, a huuuuge storm rolls in. He falls down a cliff and breaks both of his legs. The pain is unbearable. He screams and screams but no one hears him. Finally after what seems like days, a group of monks find him and carry him to their monastery. Chapter Two Once the man wakes up he thanks the monks for saving his life. They give him a room, food, and nice clothes. Every night in his room, he hears a banging behind his dresser. It is really loud and he is quite annoyed by it. The next morning he asked the head monk what the noise is. The head monk says " I cannot tell you, you aren't a monk." He hears the banging noise every night. HE asks the head monk every morning but he always says he cant tell him because he isn't a monk. So the climber decides to become a monk. After years and years of training to become a monk, he finally becomes one. Chapter Three So he says to the head monk, " I am a monk, so now can you tell me?" The head monk replies, " I can't tell you, but i can help show you. So he pushes the drawer back and reveals a little door, He gives the man a lantern and says to go through it. The man goes through the door into a little, dark tunnel, eager to finally find out what the noise was. He crawls for what seems like hours and hours and hours and days and days and days and days. He finally gets to the door where the banging noise is and opens the door. What he sees amazes him. Do you want to know what the banging noise was? I cant tel you, you aren't a monk!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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