How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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Who is it?

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

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Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

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Black people in Camden NJ.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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What looks red and smells like barf? Depends on how you look at the situation.

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the redsox

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why did the black man jump higher than the white man he was on a trampoline

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? A: I'm sorry. I was raised in an abusive home and I never learned how to properly express my emotions. I'm going to seek professional counseling but in the meantime we should end our relationship for your safety.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops