What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

willam dafoe

Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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