What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

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Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Why did the man die? A fridge fell on him.

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Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

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Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

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What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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