What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? after approximately 10 seconds of looking back and forth left to right the chicken finally came to a realization that the road is clear and safe to cross.

That's funnier than a zebra climbing the Eiffel tower with Bill Clinton on the 4th night of quanza

why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

Why are black people good at basketball? While there are many preternaturally gifted black men and women in professional basketball, the notion that one race holds sway over the others in terms of sheer skill and talent is a ridiculous stereotype; propagated, no doubt, by both ignorant and jealous persons of other colors.

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

Women's rights.

A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

A gay man watches football.

The kid next door was running around shouting spells and carrying a wand. ''I bet you'd love to be like Harry Potter!'' I told him. ''Yes!'' he exclaimed. So I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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