What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

There's an Irishman, a homo-sexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community!

Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

What do you call a quadriplegic person in the water? One should refer to them by their name, but seeing as a quadriplegic person would be incapable of swimming if you do see a quadriplegic person in a body of water you should seek help or call emergency services.

What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Two guys went into a bar and started drinking. After sometime one guy said to the other, "I love your mother.I want to marry her." The other guy said,"Come on dad,you have been drinking too much."

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

what is white on top and black on the bottom? Society

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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