You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

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Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

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Fishing rods are cool This haiku does not make sense Lumpy Space Princess

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Why is Macaroni Boy so Cool Because He's not

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

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what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

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Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

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What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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david what a baghead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops