^ That's not even funny ^

Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

Why did the elephant cross the road? I don't know

A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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