Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

GUESS WHAT ?????????? THATS WHAT CAOMHIN

What do you call a person that is green, wearing plaid, and standing next to you in the elevator? What ever their name is

What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

Why couldn't Billy drive? He had no arms. Why did he have no arms? Thalidomide.

Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

Bad grammers.

Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

People Eating Tasty Animals

david weres the slug gone

Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

Hey, I just met you. Nice to meet you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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