Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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What job did the black man apply for?.. Several, its a downward economy.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A multicultural parade where they all are wearing red clothes.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari ? I don't have a Ferrari in my basement.

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How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

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A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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Xbox One

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

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What's worse than waking up with cancer? Waking up dead.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Barack Obama

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

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What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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