A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

a man checks his mypsace

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is bigger.

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

whats blue and can fly? a red robin i lied about being blue By RT so u believe me

What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad seen that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

knock knock no ones home

What is yellow and can shot? A Banon.

What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...