Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

A man stand's on a chair Then he fall's off

Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

Chuck Norris once starred in a movie with Bruce Lee.

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

Why do Native Americans own Casinos? Because it's a very profitable business situation.

Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

whats chinese noodles

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

How Many R's are in Terrence? two, how could there be 6?

Nock nock Whos there? The mailman, I have a package for you. Thank you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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