guy 1: hey, i got a new dog. isn't he cute? guy 2: i just lit him on fire

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Male penises.

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why was the girl sleeping on the ground? because she was dead

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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A man walks in to a bar and says "ouch."

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How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

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A guy walks in to a bar and says "ow"

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If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you smell like crystall meth.

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The BCS

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Where did the little girl go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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You are Nerochan right?

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what do you do when a dog bites your ear off? you see that you are bleeding then you scream.

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

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Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

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why did the black guy get testicular cancer? because he put his balls in the microwave.

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What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

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An old lady walks into a bar. She was the janitor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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