Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

anne hatthaway

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

Your mother is a man.

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

Whats black and white and red / read all over * a bloody penquin * nun falling down the slairs * news paper * a clumsey panda

your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

PUDDING

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

You're so gay you actively seek homosexuals relationships.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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