what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

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Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

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a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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There once was a man from Nantucket Whose name was Mike

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Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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minorities.

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

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Women Drivers.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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