I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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