What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

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What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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alert('The Game')

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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