What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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asdasdasdasd

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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