How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Andoni was here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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