What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops