Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

So a bar walks into a man...

Knock Knock No solicitors

Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

deez nuts

What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

meatspin.fr

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

Why did the old man die? He was old.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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