The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

Why did all the boys come to my yard? Because of My milkshakes

whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

An Asian with a big dick.

A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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