Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

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What's just not right? Left

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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