what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

How do you tell the difference between a politician and a reindeer? A politician is an employee who works under a strict firm of a government department while a reindeer is a large, grazing ungulate in the family Cervidae that is native to subarctic polar regions of North America.

When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

What is yellow and bright? The sun.

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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