What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

Take part of what?

Oh, go away

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...