What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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