Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Hearing the same holocaust joke seventeen times.

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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