Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

you will like this because i am black.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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