What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops