what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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