there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Allah walked into AK Bar

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

time to spruce up!

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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