Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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