A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Read a Book.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +21

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the lady? She queefed.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down -5

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops