Is your refrigerator running? No.

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...