What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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