What do you call a blonde surgeon? Not stereotypical

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What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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Q-Why did the man fall out of the behemoth A- he had no legs

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being chased by other cannibal chickens.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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one of the idiot

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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