What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

thumb_up thumb_down +5

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

thumb_up thumb_down +5

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Fat? Jesse Z

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops