I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

a man dyslexic into bar walks a

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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