What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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