Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops