What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops