What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

thumb_up thumb_down +5

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Dane Cook makes a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

thumb_up thumb_down -5

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops