knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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