Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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A dancer walks into a barre

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Donald Trump

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Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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